Getting Him Or Her Back: Possible or Not?

Will I get my love back?

It depends.

Faith. Willingness. Hope.

These are the three ingredients that can make your relationship work again. Arriving at the notion that your heart is ready enough to travel life with your ex for the second time is a perfect sign of giving yourselves a shot. Regaining the faith that everything will turn better this time for both of you means a perfect spot to revive the fading love. Lastly, seeing the spark of hope in your heart after a temporary separation is the best time to open your door for an invigorated love affair.

It is never impossible to get back the relationship from scratch. Life is not a matter of chance. It is more on effort. Thinking that destiny is the one who caused your relationship to break is foolishness. Of course, destiny exists. But, it can never overshadow your determination to triumph over any forms of challenges. Moreover, fate is a factor in any relationship. Nonetheless, it can never overwrite the way both of you make every effort to make things done triumphantly.

Furthermore, after peeping that the chance of getting back is there, that’s the time where good decisions and actions ought to be made. Strike while the iron is hot. That spells everything. I hope that that made sense.

More elaborately, let me generously share with you the things that most successful couple did in repairing their wrecked affair. But, to give you a heads up, these things may or may not be suitable in your case. It varies from relationship to relationship. Just give them a shot to see it for yourself. There’s no harm in trying. Put that in mind.

Have a list of strengths and weaknesses of your relationship. Boost those positive aspects; and, change the negatives for the betterment of all. This way, you can look at life in your own better perspective.

Learn to set rules.

You are a unique person before you met. You hold your own personality. Your thoughts and principles are totally different with other people before the day she or comes along your way. Therefore, it is best to regain your own unique self before anything else. You are rejected because your ex might see something in you that you need enough room to improve. This way, you need to grab this wonderful opportunity to bring back the better personhood in you.

It cannot be denied that individuality is important in making a relationship beat the odds along the entire travel. Never lose grip of your own personhood for the sake of pleasing your partner. You can’t imagine the pain his or her absence will cause you.

Learn to know where you stand. Self- assessment matters a lot. If you happen to realize that it’s not you who committed faulty, an apology will just add fire to the blaze. You will step over your self- worth. Learn to be humble; but, not to the extent of letting someone else step over your dignity.

Learn to listen attentively to each other. Be open for criticisms- no matter how hurtful it is to bear. Just have the patience to discuss with discuss it with your ex lover. Be open enough to treat every criticism positively. Be willing to change the faults but never jump into your ex’s rules.

Be a determined person. You are worthy of self- identity. You are worthy to be loved in return. You are worthy to be cherished and cared for.

So will I get my ex back?

It depends. You hold the final say.

Talking about splitting up, it is undeniably hurtful and throbbing. The pain is killing us softly. It stabbed us to death. However, this is the essence of love. Love is like life. It shows too many faces. It carries too many aspects that even the most genius person on earth can’t elaborate. Love has no definition.  But, it houses thousands of different meanings. Love has no specific explanation; but, it has many different stories to tell.

The Essentials of Love

Confused? Bewildered? Doubtful?

Please don’t. You don’t need to punish yourself from feeling that way. If you want to fully understand everything about love, think again. You better halt at that very point where you stand right now. Never toil digging into a thing that is endless. Just ride on to love. Just ride on to the rollercoaster of sensations that love can proffer.

At this juncture, allow me to touch a little elaboration on this matter. First things first. Let’s talk about signs for second chances.

How will I know whether our relationship deserves a second chance? What are the signs my ex wants to get back together?

Let me tell you a secret folks.

Breaking up can go in two opposite directions. It paves way to two diverged roads. The one might lead to a stronger and a better relationship. Second chance as they might say it. On the other hand, it might lead you to a road where many new relationships sprout.

You must be aware of this fact.

The moment you broke up, ask yourself. What’s the justification behind this? What does my ex wants in breaking up with me? What’s the reason for this? If happened that your ex desires for space to make both of you grow as a better person individually; well, accept it. Take note that love is still there. However, it seems that it is still not enough to make your relationship last till forever.

In this case, give your ex the thing he or she wants without hesitation. Even if freeing him or her means pain to you, get it on. Your ex deserves freedom. If you love him or her, do so openheartedly.

In this scenario, there is no question with love. There is no doubt if love is still there because certainly it is. Therefore, never lose hope. Hold on to love. Have faith. Love will find way to make you whole again.

Accept the pain. Accept the failure. Accept the faults. But never blame yourself. Learn to deal with the mistakes if there is. Regain your self- worth that had been lost the moment you ride on your ex’s rules (the moment you throw your self love away, just to love your ex more). Be a better person. Set your own rules. Be a person of dignity and pride. Make yourself whole again. Have fun. Be happy. Savor the freedom as an uncommitted person. You will find yourself mended in the walks of time.

The moment that you were able to fix yourself, you’re ready enough to fix the shattered relationship. But, here’s the catch. You had learned your lesson. How about your ex? As the one being rejected, let your ex learn a lesson that losing you is never a good feeling. Let your ex do the move of being part of your life again.

Of course, if he or she does, there will appear many signs leading to the latter’s feelings and aspirations. What these are?

Reviving the communication is one.

Your ex will make every effort to text or call you. He or she might ask for not personal stuffs like asking for information about something.

Go for a friendly invitation.

Your ex might invite you for a date together with your circle of friends. It can be in a form of organizational forums, seminars, and the like.

Chitchat, joke and tease.

Your ex might have the tendency to talk about anything unrelated to your break up over a cup of coffee. To tell you frankly, no matter how nonsense the things that you are conversing about, you both will find them interesting to talk about. Teasing will be an effective part of it.

Most of the time, jealousy is a manifestation of love. Once you’re jealous with seeing your ex with another person, it hurts. Admit it. I know for a fact that everybody knows that moving on does not mean to say throwing away all the feelings you have for the person you spent your years with.

It was said that there are few things that a person, suffering from a shattered relationship, needs to combat to make things turn to his or her side again. Most specifically, dealing with this emotional dilemma is the first pace that couples need to work out individually.

Jealousy: Does it Help in Winning Them Back?

I believe that your minds are generating questions as to how to do it in a lightning speed. Most of you might think of the ways to win her back. You still love him or her. You know that your ex feels the same for you. So, why toil? Why suppress your feelings when you both can’t live without each other?

If you are thinking this way, better stop and lend me your ears. You deserve to be given the heads up to hit your main goal of giving your relationship a second chance.

First things first.

Here are the things that you should avoid in pushing for a plan of winning your ex back.

Contacting your ex immediately after the break up!

The bleeding heart is still weeping in extreme pain. The experience is still throbbing to reminisce. The wound is still fresh. Imagine what will possibly happen if you immediately call your ex few moments after this very sad experience. Do you think it will be helpful to bring her back? Do you think that begging her for forgiveness in the middle of his or her depression will turn everything on your side?

Of course, that’s stupid.

This is not to say against guys or girls. This is just to accentuate a very significant point that everybody must learn in dealing with break ups. “Striking the iron while it’s hot.” is a saying that is not applicable in this scenario. As much as you want to, never attempt to go into the battle knowing that your bullet can’t survive the ones used by the enemies. You will just push yourself to death.

This goes the same way with relationships and break ups. To win a battle, you should know where and when to attack. A perfect timing is necessary to revive a perfect love. Take a look at this. Your ex might have asked for enough time and space to think things over. This means that he or she is clearing his or her mind and heart with confusion. Well, if you really love this person, you ought to give what he or she wants. Love is generous. Love is kind.

In this times of bewilderment, be selfless. Though losing her or him in your sight is death, you should give your ex the things leading to his or her happiness. Thus, sacrificing your own happiness for the sake of the person you love is generosity. Generosity begets generosity. Take note with that.

Pleading, begging and making yourself too pitiful in front of her will just make you a desperate fool. This will just make her or him mad at you more than ever.

“But my ex is jealous.”

Second, making your ex feel jealous by dating somebody else is never a good idea as well. Let’s say that you are just doing this to show him or her that you can have someone better than your ex. But, let me tell you frankly. This does not make sense. You are not just pushing him or her away; but also, you are hurting an innocent heart as well. This is the most unfair thing that you can do to the three of you. I assure you, you will just mess up with the chance of getting her back.

Face the pain. Deal with it. Work with winning her heart again. No more, no less.

As we go on further, I encourage you to key in the password to open the gateway to your mind. This way you can certainly welcome the facts and realizations that I will be setting in the middle of the spotlight. Brace yourself to start the ball rolling at the count of three.

Three…Two…One

“I Can’t Forget My Ex”

We often hear this statement from individuals who just came from a very tough break up. The bitterness and sadness are transparent enough to see a vulnerable person hiding behind those sweet smiles. However, breaking up just come across this way. There is nothing we can do to resist all the pain it brings. There is nothing we can do to lessen the assault of this temporary separation. Why temporary?

The fact that couples tend to remain hopeful for a second chance in the relationship is what makes cool off temporary. But, let’s face it. Every individual’s way of dealing with the process might lead to two diverged roads. If perfect timing and appropriate steps are taken, it will lead to a road that is less traveled by. That road is through winning the ex back for good. On the contrary, if the break up is haphazardly fought against through wrongful acts, it will certainly pull you through a road that is travelled by many folks who failed to triumph over their goals.

You might ask what these wrongful acts are. To shun you from much bewilderment, let me do the specifics on this matter. The most common inappropriate step that most broken-hearted fellows do and had been doing at this point is trying to win back the love of their lives.

It was said fixing a shattered relationship can never be done within a day or two. That’s impossible. Begging and pushing yourself more and more to your ex can lead to extremely dying back fires. Letting others see you in this extremely pitiful and shameful emotional state will not help. You are just giving your ex the power to hurt you over and over again. Thus, you are letting him or her step over your pride and dignity.

You are a uniquely wonderful person who is attractive to the opposite sex. In fact, you successfully made your ex fell for you with a little effort. You had built your self- identity and took care of your dignity and pride for several years before you met him or her. So, what’s the sense of giving up everything to a person who doesn’t respect your rights and individuality?

Bear in mind that there is more to life than love. Breaking a relationship is not the end of the world. Your ex rejected and threw your love away without any note. Your ex doesn’t respect you as you. So, what’s the sense of holding on?

Regain the lost self- worth and individualism that was taken for granted for several years. Do yourself a favor. Love yourself in the best way you can. You deserve this kind of coddle. This is not as hard as what you think. Take a look at this. You had lived your life very happily for several years even before you and your ex met. You can do it. Claim it.

Forgiveness: Mends a Broken Heart 

Let me tell you something. You don’t have to. You had shared a wonderful relationship for months or years with this person. Your ex had been a witness of your triumph and failures. The romance you shared is worth- reminiscing. So, what’s the sense of forgetting all those memories? Again, you don’t have to forget your ex. This will just add more tasks to do in moving on.

Forgive. Never forget. Instead, thank your ex for wakening you up from the nightmare of a wrong love. Be thankful for the break up as a whole; because, through this, you had drawn yourself closer to being a better person who can make every girl proud of.

It is very visible that there are people who tried to hold to their partners even though love is already fading. These people prefer to sacrifice their own freedom and happiness for the sake of other people. This is quite impressive, isn’t it? However, there are also individuals who have the notion that separation or divorce is the best solution regarding relationship problems. These people consider break up as the fastest exit in this emotional dilemma.

Break up is a thing that is inseparable with commitment. The moment your lover stops holding the promises you both made, break up is anticipated to assault anytime. Signs might be showing. Coldness and awkward silence are the two most common implications of cool off. But, let me tell you one thing.

Breaking up does not have a connotation that the couples had already emptied their hearts with love for each other. No, definitely not! Oftentimes, initiating a break up is bravely done to give each other enough space to think things over. As it was, breaking up have several purposes. It is a blessing in disguise that gives both of you the chance to grow as a unique individual.

Take a look at this fact. A mineralized rock needs to be treated and processed under an extremely high temperature to be made into a brilliant gem.  This goes the same way with relationships. Challenges should be thanked for. These are the ones that make every couple stronger as they were before. Knocking down all these struggles promises a strongly- built relationship. Sewing back the love affair that had been wrecked by these tests paves way to forever commitment.

How? How to get the love back in a relationship? This is a common question that hopeful hearts might ask after breaking up.

Hurt but hopeful?

Bleeding but willing.

Moving on is our first focal point after being rejected by the most precious person we love. Broken hearted as we are.  The mishmash of ill-feelings in the bottommost part of our bleeding hearts tends to make us blind with the best actions that ought to do in dealing with the situation.

How to get the love back in the relationship?

Do you want to know more of this? Well, read on.

Love yourself.

Break up is not about you. It must not be treated against you. You are still the same person who deserves to be loved- to be cherished. Therefore, never point finger towards you. You might have done faulty. But, never admit all the blame. The moment your ex stops loving you starts the perfect time to love yourself.

Regain your self-worth.

Most break ups are twined with harsh words of insult. These shattering verbal expressions can tear your heart into tiny pieces. Thus, this makes the temporary separation more painful as it is. Anger, hatred, fear, regret, and disappointment are just few of the negative emotions that your heart can take hold of due to these circumstances.

Moreover, these undesirable sensations do not just ruin the relationship; but, shatters the confidence and self- dignity. (to the extent that you will just see yourself lying in extreme devastation)

Be hopeful enough to open your door to second chances.

Assessing yourself that you had grown enough as a better person, you need to deal with fate. Ex texting, calling and inviting you for a meeting are signs of willingness to build the relationship once more. Let me give you a heads up. If you are the rejected one, make your ex lover learn a lesson that life can never be worth-living without you on it. He or she should realize your worth. Through this, he or she will never do the same mistake again.

You deserve to be loved more than anybody else.

“Love is sweeter the second time around.”

This is a  quote that connotes forgiveness and hope. Thus, a quote that can bring out the yesterdays again.

More willing. More hopeful. More in love.

These are the three best descriptions of couples who had win the battle of mending their broken hearts; and yet, opened their doors to let the same love comes in for the second time.

Breaking up happens for a reason. It happens for a purpose. Whether you are against it, you ought to accept that it is inseparable in all relationship. Yes, you might hear a long term girlfriend- boyfriend relationship that had reached forever commitment through marriage. But, this sort of relationship does not mean to say that couples never had a break up along the way. On the same manner, a happy couple today does not mean a happy couple yesterday.

Accordingly, success in the relationship does not solely matter on the years that couples spent with each other. Moreover, it does not matter on how many times they broke up; and, for what reason. It matters more on how brave they had been in holding on to their promises as they face every morning with hands holding each other.

Breaking up has been proven to be the best way to strengthen relationships. This is the best way to make things better. This is an opportunity to grow. This is the best spot to start a firmer and bolder relationship. Without it, monotony and stagnancy are likely to happen.

Know These Truths

Nonetheless, this is not to persuade the quarrelling couples to split up. Of course, that’s foolishness. I am very certain that everybody knows that breaking up is not a joke. It hurts terribly. It stabs us to death. The worst is, it feels like hell. An ended relationship leaves our minds unattended. We are prone to becoming irrational. We are prone to becoming bitter and hopeless.

It was said that heart and mind are intertwined. The moment we lose control of our hearts, we are also losing grip of our minds. A bleeding heart might lead us to come up at the most wrongful decisions that we had ever done in our entire life. However, let us look at these reactions as normal. Never feel stupid for feeling this way. Everybody passes this stage in life. Separation and commitment are twin sisters. Once you opened your heart to love the moment it knocks on your heart, you must be willing to free this love when it desires freedom.

On the other side of the coin, in every ending, there lies a new beginning. The chapter ends. However, the book has still lots of unwritten pages. So, why not write and create new chapters on them to make the whole love story well- written?

The moment that you can feel that your heart is ready to love again, be indulged to this sensation. Share your love to someone. Be happy. Have fun. Yet, if you feel that your life is incomplete without her, win her back. Getting back together after break up is never impossible. What’s the sense of putting yourself in too much pain when you know that your ex feels the same way as you do?

The key to win her back is a grown self. You should show your ex that you are worthy of her love. You should show her that you are worthy to be fought for. And that, your love should never be wasted with self- denial and too much pride.

Learn to assess what had gone through. If you initiated the break up, learn to be brave in accepting the consequence of your decision to leave her in pain. Apology is the best way to hit your goal. Make every effort to prove your love to her. To give you a heads up, doing so is never easy. You need to assure her that you will not leave her again. Lastly, never look conceited in asking her to give you a second chance. Never look too pity in hardly begging her to come back in your life. Learn to walk along the process of winning her without crossing over the bridge of becoming too selfless, especially when you that the break up is never your fault. Never apologize when it is not necessary. That won’t help.

On the other hand, as the one being rejected, make her feel that losing you is never a good feeling. Let her learn a lesson to avoid rejecting you again. Make her do the effort of making your broken affair whole again.

Getting back together after break up is easy if you know which point to start.

Of course, post desperation and depression you would want a good warm hug, someone who hands you the ice cream, and someone who will constantly pat you on the back and will not judge you. Remember that a true friend stabs you in the front, you will the truth when you need to hear it, it may be painful and they are the last person you want to hear it from but they are mostly the first to actually bring you back to reality.

How To Get Over Boyfriend: FRIENDS!

Friends will be your constant companion whether you like it or not, they are the people who were there before you met your ex and when he merely existed as just someone you know. Hanging out with them is one of the best coping mechanisms there is, as long as you don’t go overboard and become irrational with how they are helping you cope. These friends are a good source of opinion, since they have been with you every step of the way and they must have a good look at your ex, so more often than not, they know what is happening.

Soliciting for a third person’s point of view regarding the break up will not only make you realize what lead to the break up but it will help you move on too. Remember how other people would see you have to imagine yourself to be the third person to fully understand the break up, that is basically what your friends can do for you. Yes you can listen to them but it does not necessarily mean that you base your decisions according to their opinion. You are just establishing something where you can start.

Having Fun With Friends: A Way How To Get Over Your Boyfriend

Now before you become overbearing and self indulged, you have to know when to stop talking about your ex and your break up. Your friends could only take so much drama and for sure, they don’t want seeing you staying on that page for a long time. Your friends are not limited to just listening when you whine, when they think you have had enough crying and lonely time, it is time for you to have fun.

Go party with your friends, have lunch or dinner together over some healthy conversations like what you want to do now, where do you see yourself and tell them about your new goals. They will be more than willing to help you when they can see that you are also helping yourself. Plan an out of town get away with your closest friends, it may be a new resort you discovered, or just somewhere you have been wanting to try. Friends will offer you unconditional support.

Helping You How To Get Over Your Boyfriend

Your friends will want to see you get through this rough stage. Yes they will help you but do not take them for granted, you could only expect them to be there for a while and not forever since they also have to carry on with their lives. It is a good chance to be spending as much time with them as you can but keep in mind that they would want to see you get better and not stay miserable forever.

They will not be there to support this misery. Yes it is ok to be selfish at the moment, they understand that but do not suck all the good things in them, even though you are the one in the loose end right now, you want to be talking about yourself all the time, you have to ask how their own lives are doing too, it is more of being there for each other and not being there for you alone. Take advantage of this situation to be a better friend too, after your crying spells, being with your friend will be a good distraction, how you could of better use in their lives. At the end of the day, you didn’t only maintain a great friendship; you also got a confidence boost.

ell, the minute you find yourself in the “my ex wants to see me” page, here’s what you should do, here’s how you should act and ultimately, here’s how you should manage yourself during the big meet, regardless of how long the break up space took or how strong your emotions are at the time of the meet.

The Basics of Meeting up After the Split

When composing yourself for the meet, condition your heart and mind that this is not a date. Categorically go through the meet like any random person would do. Go and be patient, casual and composed. Do not outline the things that you would want to talk about, do not rehearse the questions you want to ask or the words that you want him to hear. Proceed to the meet with care and dignity. Do not push and do not pull.

Let time take its course and let the night or day unravel what is meant for you during the meet. Do not assume, presume nor be scared. Be bold and face your ex with confidence, ease and grace. You have to appear fresh, revived and eager to move forward with your life. Never show any indication of fear and desperation; you have to act naturally, most importantly if you are clueless as to what the meet is all about from his end.

Don’ts

Meeting your ex for the first time after the break up is a critical component if you have every intention of getting her back in your life. However, this part should be handled with great care and consideration on her end. Although your body is screaming to touch her and plead for her affection back, resist the idea. Don’t. The last thing that you should be doing during the first meet is to express your feelings and your goal of getting back together. You should act coolly and attractively in a way that you don’t push her to reject you again, rather you have to push her to want you back.

Avoid raising issues during the meet. Issues of your break up and relationship should no longer be put before your goals of rekindling your relationship with your ex. Never take this opportunity to express your disgust or distaste over the break up. Remember, this is not an opportunity to shift blame, but a moment to reassess where you stand in her life. Avoid going over things that may eventually touch issues relative to the break up. You have to be gentle, caring, self-assured and confident.

Do’s

Meeting your ex after a break up is crucial to the life of your goal. This is the perfect time to gauge the reality of your mission to get her back in your life. It is important that you have a good conversation. The meet should be set in a place where you can freely and openly talk about anything. Somewhere ambient and entertaining. Avoid crowded and loud places. Again your goal is to build a new connection with your ex, and you can only do that if you get the chance to talk to her without any form of communication barrier.

Find a convenient place for both of you. And I mean, a place where both of you have a quick access to. Avoid making her feel special or appearing that you are willing to go out on a limb just to meet her. Everything you have to do has to be achieved half way. When setting the meet, again do it in moderation. Find a place accommodating enough and conducive for conversation, one that does not require you to go overboard. It should be a place that is cozy, decent and inexpensive.

Again, you are clueless why the meet is happening. At the same time you can take the opportunity to reignite the romance given the proper mood and approach, without losing your cool and confidence. Suffice it to say that you will have to appear interested but not attached. You have to survive the first meet up if you want to head to the next one. Imagine how you acted during your first casual meets, prior to your dating spree. Bring that person on the meet and I guarantee that your ex will feel that spark she felt the first time you two went out. Devise a push and pull combo that will make her feel special but not wanted.

Hold your Horses!

When your ex kissed you, it does not necessarily mean that they want to get back but that is always a possibility of course. The kiss could also mean a lot of things, like he missed you, or he was drunk, or he wants to try how you would react. To tackle this issue, you should also be aware of how you felt during and after the kiss, and do not make matters worse by assuming you are back together again because of that kiss. As baseline information for reasons why the kiss occurred, take into consideration how long you have been together, how long since the break up and both your present relationship status.

The PRO’s And CON’s:

Positive reasons may include they really want to get back. Since a kiss is a passionate indication of love, he may have thought about you ever since the break up, so he wanted to do some lasting impression, thus the kiss. After this, you don’t get to be left hanging, if he wants you back, he will tell you and you will have a mature conversation about it.

If he’s still single at the moment, that means he really want you back but things will have a different meaning if he’s dating or he’s already got a girlfriend, he’s playing you and the other girl, He can’t have the best of both worlds, before things get worse, break the contact and focus on yourself. If he really does want to get back, then he would break up or finish the present relationship he’s in then talk to you and not try to sweep you by a sheer chance of kissing you again. Now if the break up is still fresh and he kissed you, that’s one of those desperate acts of trying to get back easily and I don’t think it is effective. Since a woman’s approach is to settle the issues first before actually getting back together.

My Ex Kissed Me, What Do I Do Next?

It would not hurt to confront them about the recent event, this way they will see how you are taking control of yourself. When you get the answers, at least you know what to expect and what not to even consider. It will take a lot of courage to go up to them and ask, but if they won’t do it themselves, you only have yourself to depend on. They will not give you a straight answer; expect that, everything will be reading between the lines, they won’t deny nor confirm anything that easily and that is the biggest dilemma when dealing with a man.

Be honest with your feelings, you should also know what you want, if you want to get back too then lay all your cards on the table, read his body language. If still nothing happens, I say get on with your life, you don’t want to be with a man who is scared if his own feelings. If the “getting back” feeling is mutual, do not jump on it that easy, it is important to sort out both your issues and settle them first, so anything unwanted and irrational from the past could be easily avoided now. In the end, it is essential to understand that he did not just kissed you, you kissed him back, you didn’t do anything to protest, and you allowed the kiss to happen. You both have reasons why it happened, and those reasons are crucial to your next step.

Timing

There are hundreds of reasons for you to contact your ex however, the situation becomes hopeless when your ex hardly says a word or fails to somehow, respond to your messages. However you have to put into consideration circumstances surrounding you and your ex prior to your attempt to contact.

Immediately after the split, your ex may have to go in suspended animation. He may have to take some time off from reality to sulk in the pool of sadness you have pushed him to dive in. Approaching him, this early is a big no. You have to at least respect the space that you have asked from him or that which he asked from you. The last thing he needs during his grief is to accommodate problems or issues you have to face together. So wait for the appropriate time to contact him.

Readiness

Before you initiate contact with your ex, ask yourself are you ready to face him? This is crucial, because if you are not, then it is most likely that you will end up running away from your ex or worse spilling your guts. Determine your state of mind prior to contacting your ex.

You have to be 200% certain that you can hold yourself together should he choose to respond to you. You have to be prepared for whatever it is that he may extend to you. Be honest about your assessment of your readiness to face your ex. You have to ask yourself whether you are facing him because you simply want to see him or are you making contact just so you can extend to him your desires?

Bear this in mind – initiate contact only when all the negative emotions surrounding your break up are long gone or are no longer clouding your judgment. You have to see to it that the strength of the pain is no longer making your eyes cry voluntarily nor your mind to go in daze. You have to be able to hold yourself with grace and ease when you face him. You have to feel confident about yourself when you see him. Most importantly, you should be able to resist the idea of not letting him go after the meet.

How to Make an Uncommunicative Ex Talk

Your ex may doubt your motives for the meet. He will definitely ask himself what it that you want from him after the break up is. Expect that your ex may not even text you back the minute that you contact him for a meet. Expect also that even if he agrees to meet with you he may still have his reservations of not talking about your relationship. Rather he will only come and meet you to see how things are doing at your end after the break up. If this happens, do not push.

Be patient. Never give the room to awkwardness. What you can do is to make him feel comfortable with you. You have to understand that men will not talk to you if they are not comfortable with the way you are going to handle things, most especially so if they know how you are most likely to react on certain issues.

This is the time when you initiate a “friends” status with your ex. The purpose and goal is simple – you have to be the friend with the good ear, a warm heart and the understanding smile, never judging but always eager to guide. Take one-step at a time. Remember that when you are getting your ex back, your foremost goal is to win back their trust, and who do you trust most if you have no one around, it is your friend.

So be the generous and accommodating friend that is confident and secured. You have to stay visible in his life but you are in no way to appear needy, insecure and desperate to have him back. Let him entertain the thought of getting back with you after you have made him feel at home with you again, simply by being friends.